Has anyone ever told you that you’re “too loud”?
Or that you “take up too much space?”
Or maybe they just vaguely tell you that you are “too much?”
We’ve all been judged by the standards of other people at some point during our lives. In truth, most of us have been judged by other people’s Soul Suckers (which then tends to call forth our own inner Soul Suckers’ criticisms). Some of us have been told we’re too loud, others have been told we’re too quiet (and some of us, have been told both … now that’s not confusing at all!)
This kind of feedback can make us hide the most precious parts of ourselves – like a horse with a bit in our mouths, being held back from running wild & free …
Hear this: You are never too much. This is more about them than it is about you.
So how can we respond to and integrate this feedback as Leaders?
Ask yourself, “What’s the impact I wish to have in this moment?” This feels very different from the horse-bit, restrained feeling. Instead of holding ourselves back, we meet the world around us. If the impact that we want to have is to soothe or calm people, we will naturally adapt our voice and presence accordingly. If the impact we want to have is to light a fire under people – calling them forth – we will use a vibrant, perhaps even alarming vocal quality.
And if the people in your world still think you’re “too much” … stop and notice … are they truly in the arena with you? Or are they watching (and judging) you from the sidelines while you do all the work … ?
In either case, they can have their opinion of you, but focus instead on honoring your values and your opinion of yourself …
With Love & Passion,
PS – Sign up for the Find Your Voice Workshop – extended Early Bird through the Tuesday after Labor Day!